October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month.  The Brighton Police Department understands the complicated nature of domestic violence and is there to support victims of these crimes.  Everyone, however, can help support domestic violence victims.  When someone experiences domestic or gender-based violence, they may not know where to turn or may have had negative experiences seeking help. Your willingness to help can be crucial to their safety planning. Here are some tips to help you help:

• Have a private conversation when they're ready to talk.
• Let go of expectations of a quick fix; sometimes doing nothing is the safest option.
• Challenge your own biases about domestic and gender-based violence.
• Believe the victim and let them know you do.
• Listen without judgment and avoid giving advice.
• Refer them to a service provider for medical attention, counseling, and support.
• Focus on their strengths and coping mechanisms.
• Validate their feelings, which may be conflicting and normal.
• Avoid blaming the victim and emphasize the abuse is not their fault.
• Take their situation seriously and express concern without judgment.
• Offer specific help, such as childcare or transportation.
• Give them control over their decisions and support their choices.
• Respect their decisions, even if you don't agree, and be patient.  

If you are a victim of domestic violence, you can call 911 or the NYS Domestic and Sexual Violence Hotline, which can be reached 24/7 in most languages: Call 800.942.6906, Text 844.997.2121, or chat at opdv.ny.gov.